How to handle criticism?
"Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary. It fulfills the same function as pain in the human body. It calls attention to an unhealthy state of things."
- Winston Churchill
Only a fool can hate being criticized. But, you despise criticism more than anything else!
How to handle criticism?
Let me elaborate on the best ways in which you can handle both negative and positive criticism.
This is how you grow
As Winston Churchill mentioned, our minds need it. Human beings are the most intelligent species on the planet capable of making independent decisions. No matter your intelligence, you do need some social approval.
Let me humor you. When you were a baby, you pissed anywhere you felt like a monkey. However, your parents reprimanded you and showed you the place where you can pee!
Now, you are not a baby. People will not reprimand you but criticize you, including your own parents.
People will try to correct you and show you the right things or the right ways. This is called constructive criticism. When people are eager to help you, you are a lucky chap!
However, some people will try to demoralize you. Some will feel jealous of you. Others might disagree with you because you are not like them. Whatever the reasons, this kind of criticism is called destructive criticism.
Both are equally important to us. One makes us strong, while the other shows us the way.
The best way to handle them is to ignore destructive criticism and welcome positive ones.
Don't get too defensive
We all make mistakes. I make terrible mistakes, but make sure to learn from them. Mistakes are failures if you do not learn from them. If you haven't yet read my blog on making mistakes, then make sure to give it a read.
There is nothing to get too defensive unless physically attacked. Sure, you do need to build fences around your mental state to protect yourself from bad feedback. But do make sure to have a gate!
When a product goes awry, the company cannot cover its ears against the woes of the people who trusted the company. This is why I mentioned having a gate to filter important feedback.
Sure, you can be defensive, but there is a way to be so. You cannot hide your faults for long. Listen with open ears and analyze the problem. In this regard, I would love to put down a link where Steve Jobs handled negative criticism, and that too on stage!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FF-tKLISfPE
Don't get too defensive and learn to filter negative feedback. Let the impurities in the water settle down. Flush out the impurities. This is how to handle negative feedback.
Be a listener
There is a difference between listening and hearing. Listening is called hearing with attention. Listening involves your focus. If someone can see a black dot on a piece of white paper that you cannot see, listen to that person. This way, you can improve your product or your life.
Listening is an art. When you listen to someone, you are giving him/her a level of importance. This encourages your criticizer to get friendly with you.
Listening is a valuable tool, even for a business. It helps your customers know that you care about them. In life, no matter who is criticizing, just keep your mind and ears open and listen.
See-through the intentions of a critic
The moment you can see through the intentions of a person criticizing you, you can immediately decide if it is negative feedback or a positive one.
It does in no way mean that all those who love you will always offer positive feedback. Often, parents criticize their children so much that they become stagnant. Destructive criticism can simply come from a place of ignorance.
Sometimes, criticism can be subjective. Your work of art may appeal to someone, but not everyone. Of course, you cannot please everyone!
Be humble
Do not look down on your opponents. Do not call yourself the best!
People can sense humility in you the moment they see your response to their criticism. A haughty is never willing to acknowledge his/her mistakes. This only results in more negative criticism and hatred.
How to be humble?
Say a thank you to your critic! A compliment to a critic is a game-changer. Instead of justifying your actions, phrases like,
"Thank you! This will help us get better next time."
"Thank you for bearing with us. We learn from you!"
"Thank you, I will improve upon this aspect. Do leave feedback next time!"
These are just example phrases. You can make your own in a way that sounds humble. Humility is a gift. Have a learning attitude and be humble.
Be positive
In today's depressed world, it is a skill to feel positive. What is the meaning of being an optimist?
An optimist always tries to find something positive in every situation. This is the same in the case of destructive criticism. People will throw rocks at him, out of which he will build a cathedral. This is the beauty of being an optimistic person.
If you want to know more about being positive, you can refer to my other blog from the link below.
https://www.yashkedia.com/2020/08/easy-ways-to-be-happy-with-yourself.html
Like all other positive people, I am also ready to face your criticism. Do comment down below what you feel about the blog and how I can improve myself.
Last but not least, do remember to be calm when someone is leaving negative feedback. It is easy to become temperamental. Remember to shoot back kindness to receive kindness!
"Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain but it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving."
- Dale Carnegie
This is how to handle criticism.
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